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12 Reasons Why Your Relationships Don’t Ever Last and What to Do About It
12 Reasons Why Your Relationships Don’t Ever Last and What to Do About It
Have you noticed that your relationships rarely last beyond a few months? They’re always sweet and serious at the beginning, but before long, everything crumbles, leaving you wondering why you haven’t been lucky in love. Despite being handsome, beautiful, affectionate, and seemingly perfect, you may struggle to establish a lasting relationship. In this post, we’ll reveal the hidden reasons why relationships often don’t last and explore possible solutions. Read to the end, as this may provide answers to a problem you’ve faced for a long time.
12 Reasons Why Your Relationships Don’t Last:
1. You Refuse to Learn from Your Past Mistakes.
One main reason your relationships don’t last may be a failure to learn from past mistakes. Before starting a new relationship, take time to reflect on the lessons and mistakes of your previous relationships to avoid repeating them. For example, if your last relationship ended because of cheating, and you are lucky to find a new partner, repeating that mistake can lead to another breakup.
If your previous relationship ended due to issues like excessive friendships with the opposite sex, avoid repeating this mistake in future relationships. Failure to learn from past mistakes could lead to continued instability.
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2. Open and Honest Conversations.
Being open and honest about the kind of relationship you desire can foster a stable, healthy bond. When meeting someone new, engage them in thoughtful conversation and clearly express what you want; this will give insight into what to expect in the future. For instance, if you don’t want to engage in sex before marriage, asking your partner about their views can clarify their perspective early on.
Honest and open conversations are important in selecting the right partner. Transparency builds trust, unlike relationships built on lies, which rarely last. The day the truth comes out, the relationship may end.
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3. Jumping to Another Relationship Without Healing.
A stable relationship requires fully moving on from previous relationships. Especially for those with multiple ex-partners, unresolved feelings can hinder loyalty and growth in new relationships. Holding onto past attachments can prevent a person from being fully present with a new partner.
Take time to heal on your own and strengthen yourself emotionally. Don’t punish an innocent person for the mistakes of your ex-partner. Using a new partner to seek revenge or distract yourself can lead to unstable relationships, especially if they find out your motives.
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4. Dating the Same Type of People.
Another reason your relationships don’t last is that you continually date the same type of people. For instance, if you leave one type of partner only to find someone with similar traits, like leaving a gee boy for another gee boy or dumping one hookup girl for another low-key hookup girl, you may end up with the same issues. Changing the type of person you date can help you avoid repeating past patterns.
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5. Ignoring Red Flags Because of Love.
It’s a misconception that love is blind; in reality, love can see but sometimes chooses to overlook red flags. Ignoring warning signs in a partner can ultimately harm the relationship. If you’re the type that overlook red flags, you may experience instability because those issues can eventually break the relationship. For example, staying with a toxic, unfaithful, or abusive partner because of love may waste time and cause more pain.
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6. Rushing Things.
Rushing into relationships often leads to short-lived connections. Take time to build a friendship first and observe behaviors before committing. Just because someone shows kindness early on doesn’t mean they’re right for you. Developing a friendship first gives you time to see signs of incompatibility.
Few years ago, I met a beautiful lady; of course she has a job and likewise an HND holder like me; sincerely, her character was very good, but I didn’t allow that to fool me because I understand that people are very good at pretending at first. I invited her over and we talked, and along our conversations she uttered some words that made me know this girl can never be decent, so I stuck to being friends first to be sure of the signs I saw, and behold, a month after the talking stage, I got to realize she was a low-key hookup girl just using her business to cover her face. I also borrowed her phone, and what I saw didn’t surprise me either. That was how I backed off. If I had jumped into the relationship from the onset because of her beauty and hospitality without figuring out who she was, I could have fallen in love with a hookup girl, and getting out may not be that easy.
So, I think it’s best if you make it a normal approach to start with being friends first before dating them. This can be helpful perhaps if your relationship doesn’t last.
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7. Medical Compatibility.
Your relationship won’t last if you ignore medical compatibility issues, especially genotype and blood group. No matter how much you love each other, if you and your partner are not medically compatible, the relationship won’t last. You should know this earlyon.
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8. Choosing Beauty Over Character.
While physical attractiveness is appealing, prioritizing character and shared values is crucial for long-term happiness. If your relationships haven’t lasted beyond a few months, it could be due to focusing too much on physical traits rather than qualities that contribute to a lasting bond. Change your perspective to a husband and wife material qualities that will lead to a fulfilling partnership.
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9. Poor Character and Behavior.
Poor character traits like dishonesty, anger, selfishness, or abusiveness can hinder a lasting relationship. While physical beauty may attract, only positive attitudes and behaviors can sustain a relationship. Reflect on your own habits and work on adjusting negative behaviors that could harm your relationships.
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10. Sex and Relationship Stability.
Some people may experience unstable relationships if they choose to abstain from sex until marriage. Especially for men and women that are religious, finding a partner who understands you and is ready to wait till you are ready can be difficult. In this case, it is advisable to date someone who shares the same values as you to avoid any frustration.
If you don’t want sex, either you stay single till you are ready or you date someone who shares the same interests as you; otherwise, you will see yourself jumping from one relationship to another every 3 months while facing the same problem.
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11. Waiting for the “Messiah”
This life is your responsibility. If you are still waiting for an already-made man or rich woman to date you and lift you out of poverty, you might end up in disappointment because nobody wants to marry a man or woman who adds no value. Understand that this is your life and it is your responsibility. Work hard on your own and put your life in shape so as to attract good people towards you.
If you are waiting for a messiah that will date you and take you out of the trenches, it is possible the relationship won’t last because most successful people too wouldn’t settle for the less. So work hard and build your life; otherwise, you will keep on getting the same result of unstable relationships.
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12. Spiritual Factors.
If you have all the qualities for a stable relationship yet still face instability, the issue could be spiritual. You may investigate by starting with your family history. Are there family members that are facing the same challenges as you? Do you notice signs of a spiritual husband or wife? If yes, the next thing to do is to pray if you are a believer in faith. Whatever God you believe in, pray to him. Moreso, don’t rush into any relationship or marriage; just be patient and give it time. The right person for you will surely come. Patience is the key here while praying to God.
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