How to Become a Strong Independent Woman: 20 Steps to Get You Started

Becoming an independent woman is about more than just financial autonomy. It’s about building confidence, embracing self-reliance, and creating a life that reflects your values and aspirations.  Becoming an independent woman is a gradual process that requires strong determination, full dedication, and consistency. Here are 20 steps to get you started.

How to Become an Independent Woman:

1. Be Patient.

Understand that life progresses in stages. Don’t rush yourself or become too desperate for financial stability. Be patient with yourself and trust that everything will come in time. Whatever you choose to do—whether schooling, work, or learning a skill—be patient. You will surely get there.

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2. Pursue Your Dreams.

One of the steps to becoming a strong, independent woman is to chase your dreams and career. Go to school, get a degree, learn more skills, and try new things. More degrees and skills can open doors to financial freedom, and financial stability is key to becoming an independent woman.

Take your life seriously, make sure you pursue your career, and don’t give up on it. Do not sacrifice your career for love or relationships. Remember, your career is important in becoming an independent woman.

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3. Learn Multiple Skills to Be Self-Reliant.

The more skills you have, the more income you can make. It might be difficult at first, but along the journey, you will thank yourself for making this decision. Learn at least two vocational skills and how to run a business. For example, you may consider learning baking, catering services, and interior decoration. This will also be an added advantage to your degree if there are no job opportunities. 

Having multiple sources of income is one of the steps to becoming a strong, independent woman. It won’t be easy at first, but with time, patience, and consistency, you will achieve it.

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4. Pay Your Bills Yourself.

Understand that men are not born to pay your bills; you are capable of doing that yourself. Do not expect a man—whether a boyfriend, friend, or uncle—to foot all your bills. You should be able to get basic things for yourself, such as food, transport, data, airtime, and your own accommodation. Have an equal share in the bill. For example, if a man takes you out on a date, you can split the bill depending on the circumstances. An independent woman does not wait for a man to take on all her responsibilities; she also offers support.

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5. Your Business, Job, Or Career is a Priority.

Your job, business, or career should be a top priority because this is where your power to become an independent woman comes from. If you are in business, put in the effort and work hard. If you work for a firm or in a career field, be passionate about your work. Hard work and multitasking are notable qualities of an independent woman.

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6. Learn to Turn Down Freebies.

An independent woman must know when to turn down freebies from men. This may include free rides, accepting gifts from admirers, and allowing strangers to pay your bills at the grocery store. You should be able to do these things on your own because you are strong. Even if men insist on giving you a ride or paying your bills, you may turn down the offer to create respect for yourself.

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7. Learn From Successful, Independent Women.

There are many successful, independent women all over the world, such as Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala, Oprah Winfrey, Rosie the Riveter, and Coco Chanel. They are powerful, knowledgeable, and elegant, and they have changed the world in their own way. To learn more about them, choose one as your role model and follow her footsteps. Read their quotes, watch their TV shows on YouTube, and emulate their positive attitudes. The more you learn, the bigger you grow in becoming a strong, independent woman.

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8. Take Care Of Yourself.

Self-love is important in becoming an independent woman. Take good care of yourself, look beautiful, eat healthy food, and hit the gym for regular exercise. All these will help keep you in a good mood and help your body and mind stay sharp and healthy.

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9. Don’t Compare Yourself with Others.

You are unique, beautiful, and strong in your own right; therefore, there is no need to compare your life with others. Remember, you are strong and independent, and people like you are rare. Comparing your life with other women can discourage you and lead to decisions that are not true to you. This is your life; you should live it in a way that pleases you, regardless of what others may say. This is an effective way to be a strong woman because you don’t allow peer pressure to control your life.

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10. Be Submissive to Your Man in a Relationship.

Being a strong, independent woman doesn’t mean allowing your ego or career to ruin your chances of building a healthy relationship or happy marriage. Be submissive to your man. While you may have your differences, it is important to respect your man as the leader in the relationship or marriage. If you can maintain a healthy relationship or happy marriage, you are not only an independent woman but also a strong one.

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11. Be Open to Learning.

Becoming an independent, strong woman doesn’t mean you know it all. Be open to learning and take corrections where necessary. For example, if your family and friends are complaining about some of your attitudes, it may be the best decision to look into their complaints and address them. Being financially self-reliant doesn’t mean you know everything; be open to learning, and you will grow.

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12. Determine Your Life Goals.

Understanding what you want to achieve and the methods you need to apply are essential. Set up your plan, your strategies, and your steps, and set deadlines for achieving your goals. For instance, if you have just graduated from school, make plans for your post-graduation goals, how you wish to achieve them, and set target deadlines. Are you going to work for a while? Learn a skill? Start a business? Understanding your life’s goals will help strengthen your resolve.

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13. Don’t Rush into Marriage.

Independent women don’t rush into marriage. Build your life, career, and goals first before settling down. Most men want an independent woman because she is a woman of value, so create value for yourself by investing in yourself before starting a family. When you finally find love, make sure you marry a man who understands you and is supportive of your career and well-being.

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14. Surround Yourself with Supportive Friends.

Select friends who will help you become stronger and achieve your dreams. A key aspect of becoming a strong, independent woman is building a supportive friendship circle with mutual interests and like-minded individuals. Befriend other independent women. Evaluate your friendships and ensure they align with your core values while aiming to live a better life and make a great impact.

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15. Invest in Your Time and Money.

Learn how to invest your money and use your time wisely. Do not waste your time doing things that do not add value to your life. Learn new skills and invest your money in something useful. Be passionate about your work, because it will be a vital tool while learning about investment and saving opportunities.

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16. Support Yourself and Others.

Embrace the slogan “We rise by lifting others.” Help the people around you in whatever way you can, as this will go a long way in making you a role model for other women. Empower and encourage other women without judgment or condemnation.

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17. Learn From Your Mistakes.

Nobody is perfect; we all make mistakes. Life itself is perhaps a school. Learn from your own mistakes and from others’ mistakes to avoid repeating them. You don’t learn to walk by following rules. You learn by doing and by stumbling along the way.

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18. Travel And Explore.

One of the best ways to build independence is to travel, either alone or with like-minded individuals. Traveling opens your mind to new perspectives, cultures, and experiences that foster self-reliance.

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19. Embrace Emotional Independence.

Emotional independence means managing your feelings and not relying on others to make you feel complete. This form of self-reliance is crucial for maintaining balance in your life and relationships.

• Know your worth: Your value is not defined by others’ opinions. Acknowledge your strengths and work on your weaknesses without external validation.
• Handle emotions with maturity: Practice emotional regulation. When you feel upset, take a moment to reflect and manage your emotions before reacting.
• Be comfortable with solitude: Learn to enjoy your own company. Spend time alone doing activities that nurture your soul, whether that’s reading, writing, or meditating.

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20. Build a Fulfilling Career.

A fulfilling career is a significant part of independence. It gives you the means to support yourself financially and helps you grow professionally and personally.

• Pursue your passions: Align your career with what excites you. When you’re passionate about your work, it becomes a source of empowerment rather than just a paycheck.
•  Keep learning: Stay updated with industry trends and continuously improve your skills. Career development ensures you remain competitive and can achieve your professional goals.
• Negotiate and advocate for yourself: Whether it’s asking for a raise, seeking a promotion, or setting boundaries in the workplace, don’t be afraid to stand up for your needs and desires.

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